texts with my brother

Chuck: New Haircut. I look like a jerk.

Me: You look like Ronaldo missing his PK last night. Not good.

Chuck: Never ask me how you look.

Me: You're the one who said you look like a jerk. And I compared you to Ronaldo.

Chuck: You're not supposed to rub it in.
             But at least he looks good
             Right? Like, a handsome jerk?

Me: Right, you know he's a jerk, but he might be the best looking jerk in Europe.

Cristiano Ronaldo (missing his penalty kick v. Munich)